My son was recently diagnosed with ADD/ADHD. Upon this diagnose, my son's school counselor repeated over and over "you are your son's advocate". I am his shield when he knows no difference. So, I find that I become momma bear very easily when situation arise that paint my son in harsh light. I should also mention that my son has difficulty lying. I know, "yeah, right". No really. If I ask if he's not done something more often than not, he will answer he hasn't. Of course, I'm thinking, don't most nine-year-olds say the opposite?
So that brings us to today. My son is being punished TOMORROW, for calling a girl a cuss word, YESTERDAY. Now I agree punishment for the cuss word, YES. But if it was so hurtful, why did it take a day for the girl to tell a teacher (because the teacher had no knowledge of it)? And if we begin to punish for past performances what is the statue of limitations? And if my son hadn't of been so honest, who's word would of won out if he had lied and said he didn't say it?
Again, not advocating lying but just wondering.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Am I sick?
I was one of those kids growing up that seemed to always be dealing with some sort of sniffle. If it wasn't allergy related it was ear infections or chicken pox. In fact I got so used to having ear infections that most times I didn't even tell my mom about them because I knew I'd have to be taken to the doctor's office for a SHOT. I HATE SHOTS!!! So, I'd just wait it out till it went away. I have since learned that wasn't the best strategy since I had to have my ear drum rebuilt seven years ago do to the large hole in my ear drum from so many unchecked ear infections.
So, it's not too surprising with this history that I self-medicate and when all else fails finally drag myself to the doctor's office.
At this time every year the flowering trees in our yard wreak havoc with my sinuses. So, out comes what ever allergy medicine I have to combat the flying pollen. Most times it works, except this year. For two weeks I've been hacking my head off and scaring everyone with my inflamed eyes. It took going three nights without sleep to get my butt in the doctor's office. Guess what, I have bronchitis.
Go figure?! Having been prescribed an inhaler which has made life so much better, I'm left wondering why it takes me so long to go to the doctor.
I have yet to leave the doctor's not feeling better. Why after thirty-six years does it still take me being beyond miserable to get the much needed help? Am I afraid of wasting the doctor's time if it's not serious? I don't have a problem calling my sons' pediatrician when they get a little sniffle but it takes being miserable for me to go.
Things that make you go hmmmmm.
So, it's not too surprising with this history that I self-medicate and when all else fails finally drag myself to the doctor's office.
At this time every year the flowering trees in our yard wreak havoc with my sinuses. So, out comes what ever allergy medicine I have to combat the flying pollen. Most times it works, except this year. For two weeks I've been hacking my head off and scaring everyone with my inflamed eyes. It took going three nights without sleep to get my butt in the doctor's office. Guess what, I have bronchitis.
Go figure?! Having been prescribed an inhaler which has made life so much better, I'm left wondering why it takes me so long to go to the doctor.
I have yet to leave the doctor's not feeling better. Why after thirty-six years does it still take me being beyond miserable to get the much needed help? Am I afraid of wasting the doctor's time if it's not serious? I don't have a problem calling my sons' pediatrician when they get a little sniffle but it takes being miserable for me to go.
Things that make you go hmmmmm.
Monday, April 21, 2008
"The mommy wars"
My oldest son is eight soon to be nine. So, for the past nine years I've been labeled a stay-at-home mom. Never did I see myself as someone who would not work outside of the home after I had children. Now don't get me wrong, I do really love being home with them. And feel truly blessed that there isn't a moment in their lives that I wasn't able to document (scrapbook) and experience. My quest to identify myself with my b.c. (before children) job has lessened. I used to say "well, I was an interior designer before children" as if just being a mom wasn't impressive enough.
You have to understand that I was raised with a working mom which meant my after school activities began with daycare. I LOVED DAYCARE and couldn't imagine my kids not experiencing all that I had in daycare. If there was a factory within driving distance I've toured it. Who else doesn't go swimming three times a week during the summer with roller skating once a week for good measure. I actually saw all the first Star Wars movies when they were first in theaters because of daycare. As you can see I feel daycare enriched my life not to mention helped me with friendships. It makes for a long summer if you can't get along with your fellow daycare friends.
So, I have been amazed at this ongoing debate between moms. Both sides of the coin have pros and cons. I know several women who would make very unhappy moms if their days were filled with stay-at-home duties and that was all. Their very essence thrives on achieving, excelling at making money. I don't know if this has come from us as women measuring ourselves by society and what it deems as success or if it's something we have put upon ourselves. I couldn't imagine them staying home. Their misery would make home life so unhappy. Being at home kind of looses it's point when "mommy ain't happy".
And so I sit straddling a fence between moms battling what makes them/their families happy. Is it really right that one mom should judge what makes another mom's family happy?
You have to understand that I was raised with a working mom which meant my after school activities began with daycare. I LOVED DAYCARE and couldn't imagine my kids not experiencing all that I had in daycare. If there was a factory within driving distance I've toured it. Who else doesn't go swimming three times a week during the summer with roller skating once a week for good measure. I actually saw all the first Star Wars movies when they were first in theaters because of daycare. As you can see I feel daycare enriched my life not to mention helped me with friendships. It makes for a long summer if you can't get along with your fellow daycare friends.
So, I have been amazed at this ongoing debate between moms. Both sides of the coin have pros and cons. I know several women who would make very unhappy moms if their days were filled with stay-at-home duties and that was all. Their very essence thrives on achieving, excelling at making money. I don't know if this has come from us as women measuring ourselves by society and what it deems as success or if it's something we have put upon ourselves. I couldn't imagine them staying home. Their misery would make home life so unhappy. Being at home kind of looses it's point when "mommy ain't happy".
And so I sit straddling a fence between moms battling what makes them/their families happy. Is it really right that one mom should judge what makes another mom's family happy?
Sunday, April 20, 2008
What Defines You?
I took a Sociology class in college that asked us to write down all the titles we define ourselves as, for instance, daughter, friend, student, etc. As I experience life, I've noticed I define myself also by events such as where I live or an event that has happened to me. And as time moves on I notice that we, most people, define our lives by tragedy.
My family experienced a fire. And I have found that when meeting someone new it seems I bring this event up at some point early in our meeting. Why? I didn't lose a love one, my house has since been rebuilt. I don't want to be defined by this event but I can't seem to help it.
I say this because I was struck by a moment the other day that has left me puzzled. A mom, that I recently met and have spoken to a few times over this past school year has chosen to not define herself by tragedy. In the various conversations we've had they've revolved around children/family. Our sons happen to be in kindergarten together. She has other children, younger. So, of course conversations lead to talk about her other children, ages, gender, etc.
The event that happened was coming across a newspaper article posted at our pediatricians' office which had a photo of this family and a charity event the father was participating in because of the death of their first child.
WOW! Never once in the conversations we had had did the topic of a first child or losing a first child taken place. What an amazing woman! Here something so tragic, so profoundly painful, something that would hit you every day you woke up and choosing not to let it define you. I was blown away.
Why as a society do we make anniversaries for tragedy? Do we want tragedy to define our life? When do we make the decision to define our live by happiness? Celebrate life not death?
My family experienced a fire. And I have found that when meeting someone new it seems I bring this event up at some point early in our meeting. Why? I didn't lose a love one, my house has since been rebuilt. I don't want to be defined by this event but I can't seem to help it.
I say this because I was struck by a moment the other day that has left me puzzled. A mom, that I recently met and have spoken to a few times over this past school year has chosen to not define herself by tragedy. In the various conversations we've had they've revolved around children/family. Our sons happen to be in kindergarten together. She has other children, younger. So, of course conversations lead to talk about her other children, ages, gender, etc.
The event that happened was coming across a newspaper article posted at our pediatricians' office which had a photo of this family and a charity event the father was participating in because of the death of their first child.
WOW! Never once in the conversations we had had did the topic of a first child or losing a first child taken place. What an amazing woman! Here something so tragic, so profoundly painful, something that would hit you every day you woke up and choosing not to let it define you. I was blown away.
Why as a society do we make anniversaries for tragedy? Do we want tragedy to define our life? When do we make the decision to define our live by happiness? Celebrate life not death?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)